12 Must-Try Subscription Boxes for 2018
A product “listicle” and copywriting parody for DMNews.
The home-and-office cooking subscription for thrifty mimalists who can’t be bothered. No fuss-meals change daily, from “Can of Chickpeas with Hot Sauce” to “Peanut Butter with Fresh Crackers.” Delish!
Do you know where your nail clippers are? Receive a new set of nail tools each month, and stop keeping track. Ultra precision clippers give you the most advanced clip possible, to polish your look and rid toxins from the body.
Self care is in, and so is dental hygiene. No more excuses with fun flavors that change monthly. Treat your gum-line to creme brulee, lavender sage, hickory smoke and other vivid flavors. It’s the perfect gift for kids!
Get the daily news printed on paper and delivered to your doorstep… every day! Paper news is a nostalgic ritual and a retro home accent. Recycle or burn after reading.
No more news today! This omni-channel solution includes earplugs, distracting puzzles, and apps that effectively block up to 98% of political web content (leaving only photos of wild, non-endangered baby animals and pink noise).
The modern human is young at heart and delights in tactile diversions. Bubblewrap crate delivers a full crate of bubblewrap to your door each week, so you can pop your stress away, sheet after sheet.
The modern human is done with dating apps. Let date crate do the matching! Every month on the full moon we send you to meet another subscriber who we think you’ll like, at one or several of our intriguing sponsored locations.
The age of bottled air is imminent, and early adopters are eager to develop a palate for the impending trend. Air of the month graces your home with a curation of fine airs from pristine sources around the globe.
Ditch the CSA and start farming at home. Our seed deliveries challenge you to contend with an unending supply of rutabaga, and enough fennel to flavor a feast! Hydroponic grow kit offsets delivery emissions by a zillion percent.
Countertop troll farming is an easy and enriching way to grow sentiment at home. Troll farm shareholders collect a new troll each month to cultivate an organic influence.
Receive three hand-picked “finds” every month. These carefully curated tchotchkes are vaguely functional and full of mass appeal… perfect for gifting and re-gifting to friends on their special days.
The concept is bold and simple: Every month, receive an empty box. Fill it with all of the unnecessary doodads that have invaded your home. Send the box away. Sit in the new empty space, and download a free meditation session.